Does Music Therapy Help with Stage Fright?
Anxiety manifests itself in many ways - we may feel restless, jittery, thoughts spiraling out of control, clammy hands, or our breathing is disorderly. The last place you want this to happen is in front of an audience while trying to perform. Even the most seasoned musicians and actors still get bouts of stage fright. What changes isn’t the fear but how they’re able to process it and transform it into something constructive rather than destructive. This blog post serves a dual function; it answers the all-important question, “is music therapy right for me if I have performance anxiety?” which is a question I get asked one way or another all the time. On the other side of the coin, another frequent question is, “will music therapy help me overcome performance anxiety outside of a therapeutic setting?” Let’s dive into it!
Is music therapy suitable for me if I struggle with performance anxiety?
Short answer: yes, of course, music therapy is for everyone. Slightly longer answer: when an individual learns about music therapy and inquires more about the practice, they show an immediate interest in it. The idea of therapy combined with what may be a huge passion for that person immediately piques their interest. “But alas!” they may say, “I have a passion for music, but I’m private about it. Will my performance anxiety hamper my relationship with my therapist? Will I be able to sing in front of them? Play a song on guitar in front of them? Share with them deeply personal lyrics?”
This hypothetical person looking for music therapy is missing a crucial part of music therapy: you’re working with a certified therapist. This might come as a “well duh” moment, but many people tend to not think about this! My role, and the role of therapists at large, is to help relieve you of anxiety and to give you the tools necessary to overcome anxiety. The road map looks different for everyone. Therapy is a highly personalized experience. Maybe we don’t sing and play music our first session or two or three, but as the comfort grows between a therapist and client, so does the ability to shed anxieties and perform. I’ve summed this up in my award-winning (*not actually award-winning) mathematical (*not actually mathematical) formula (*technically a formula):
Okay it may not be award-winning, or mathematical, but it does showcase something important !
Your comfort with your music therapist (maybe me!) is only one step towards overcoming your performance anxiety within the context of music therapy. At the end of the day, the most critical aspect is being comfortable with yourself, at least enough to be vulnerable. This is no easy task, trust me, it’s easier said than done. But it doesn’t have to be 100%, it doesn’t even have to be 80%, it’s difficult to even get to like being 50% comfortable with yourself! There’s a sweet spot, and indeed numbers can’t express this, but growing comfort with your therapist will eventually meet your comfort levels. You’ll be able to explore not only the joys of singing, playing music, etc., but also the vulnerability necessary to heal and grow!
Alright, but what about general performance anxiety?
This hypothetical person I had mentioned - let’s name them Alice - has come to me and expressed their concern about music therapy and performance anxiety. No problem, I assure them that if they stick with it, they’ll eventually be able to be open about singing in front of me. Only after two sessions Alice found their voice and felt comfortable enough to sing in front of me. Not only that but singing about issues that are difficult to express just by talking. By our fourth session, Alice is open to sharing their lyrics, playing their guitar, and showing me the music they’ve made to process their emotions. I have a conversation with them, asking them to dive into the lyrics. I commend them on how well they’re using the medium of music to process emotions and remind them about how nervous they were when they first came to me. Just over the course of a month, they went from being afraid to sing in front of me to being open and honest about their feelings, singing and playing, and not being worried about making a mistake or their lyrics not being perfect.
So Alice asks me, “do you think I should perform my songs at an open mic in town on Friday?” and yes! I would encourage them to. They have a beautiful voice and I think people would relate to their lyricism. But, much like when they first came to me, they show a bit of reluctance. “Well,” they say, “what if my voice gives away, what if I can remember the lyrics, what if I play the wrong chords, what if, what if,” alright let’s edit the formula from before:
I found making changes with a marker easier than paying someone to edit the photo, sue me.
Really, honestly, it hasn’t changed that much! Like, yes, okay, there is a BIG difference between strangers at a cafe on Friday open mic and your therapist - that’s a given. Still, I’d ask, how big is that difference? When Alice first came to me, they had a lot of doubts, but being around me was enough to show them I wasn’t a threat, I wasn’t going to be mean, and I had nothing but their best intentions in mind. Because they grew comfortable with me, they were able to be more comfortable as theirself and overcome the fear of performing in front of me. This doesn’t change much for performing in front of an audience!
I’d say to Alice, “well, if you’re really that worried, maybe treat open mic night like our therapy sessions. Go to one and not perform, get a feel for the other people playing, audience reactions, and try chatting up some of the people that play. Next week you might feel more comfortable, or maybe not, but that’s okay! Keep showing up, seeing friendly faces, and making friends. It will eventually go from playing in front of 15 strangers and 0 friends to playing in front of 2 strangers and 13 friends.”
Every situation is unique; every experience is personal and individualized. I mean, my journey as a musician and playing in open mics is a long and winding one. I still get nervous, but I’ve learned to channel that nervous energy into performance energy. Letting my performance anxiety pump me up for playing instead of having me second guess myself. Will music therapy cure your performance anxiety? Maybe, maybe not, but I can assure you that it will give you the tools necessary to manage it. If you’re interested in music therapy and want to learn more about how it can help you overcome anxiety feel free to contact me for a free consultation!